Comedian Aziz Ansari has a few dating pet p𝔉eeves: “Using the bathr♈oom on the street . . . not into that at all. Blatant stealing of expensive home electronic equipment from stores like a Best Buy . . . that’s kind of hard to work with,” he tells The Post.
But the “Parks and Recreation” star, who often riffs on relationships in his🥀 act, turns serious on the subject in his new book, (Penguin Press), out Tuesday. He and NYU sociologist Eric Klinenberg interviewed hundreds of people and conducted focus groups everywhere from Tokyo to Buenos Aires to explore courtship, what turns people on, and how texting and online dating have changed the pursuit of love.
The 👍32-year-old comic, who’s been in a relationship with chef Courtney McBroom for nearly two years, says his research has taught him just how low the bar for men really is. In one discussion with a group of women about texts they receive from guys, Ansari recounts, “They said most of the texts are, ‘Hey, what’s going on?’ ‘What are ᩚᩚᩚᩚᩚᩚᩚᩚᩚ𒀱ᩚᩚᩚyou up to?’ ‘Are you doing anything tonight?’ ”
🉐“I realized that inviting someone to a specific thing at a specific time — that made women’s vaginas explode in our interviews.”
As for his own love life, Ansari’s rela๊tionship with McBroom — who started off as a sous chef at David Chang’s Mꦐomofuku Milk Bar and whom Ansari met through friends years ago — has had a bit of explosive power all its own.
“We moved in together pretty fast because we were so easygoing and happy with each other,” says Ansari, who wooed her early on with a date to the Magic Castle in LA, a private home-turned-magical arts den. “Everything was 𓄧fine. And it’s still pretty good.”
“Modern Romance” (for which Ansari got a reported $3.5 million advance) is full of tidbits to help readers land a pastry chef of their own. Like the fact that studies show men do better at online dating when they post photos of themselves with animals and that waiting to respond to a text message does, in fact, increase your desirability. They also found that Japanese singles think using a photo of themselves on a🌺 dating app is too narcissistic — so instead, they post photos of cats or rice cookers.
Ansari, who never online dated — bec🅷ause of his fame, he explains — maintains that technology has been a boon to the single population. “More people meet through online dating than work, school and friends combined,” says Ansari. (Between 2005 and 2012, one-third of all married US couples met on the Internet, according to the book.)
But the World Wide Web may also provide a few too many options, Ansari says, especially in h🍃yperpacedꦺ NYC.
“There are some people here that have what we call ‘the upgrade problem.’ Why would I settle down with someone? Every time I turn the corner, there’s this amazing person,” says Ansari, who admits that in his bachelor days, he was always hunting fo𒉰r the next best-thing.
At 5-foot-6, Ansari is satisfied as ever with his 5-foot-7 girlfriend ꦺ— especially hav🌃ing dissolved his random, “ideal girl” checklist (shorter than him, brunette, younger).
“Non🅺e of that s - - t really matters,” says Ansari. “What you really want is someone you can hang around with on a Sunday afternoon💯 and watch a TV show with, and do nothing, and feel like it’s the most fun ever.”